Identity – Molly Ovenden Creativity

10 Questions to Ask so You Can Habitually Finish Your Book(s)!

10 Questions to Ask so You Can Habitually Finish Your Book–or Books!

Is this you?

So many people loved writing when they were in school, but once adulthood set in, they believed they only had time for serious endeavors which don’t include writing.

So many people believe they’ve got a book in them, but they feel scared or uncertain about starting, or just can’t seem to find the time.

So many people have started writing a book, but haven’t finished because they’ve burnt out with perfectionism, fizzled out with fear about what others might think of them, or they procrastinated and ran out of time and motivation.

You don’t have to be one of these people.

The fact that you’re here, taking in these words, shows me that YOU ARE A BRILLIANT WRITER! You’ve got a desire to learn, to get your words from brain to page, and to truly make an epic and life-changingly positive impact on the world.

You CAN do this. You CAN write this book. You CAN get your book published and into the hands of those readers who will devour your words.

When you find yourself struggling to show up for your daily writing or you’re at the edge of the finish line, but dragging your feet, here are 10 lovingly convicting questions to ask yourself (perhaps via reflective journal entry) to find the courage you need to follow through.

1. Who are you as a writer?

Identity is so important when we write. If you don’t know who you are, it will be really challenging to write authentically. Often writers resist becoming authors, resisting publication, resisting the accountability for finishing what you said was important.

If you don’t know who you are, then you don’t have a certainty about whom you’re making this writing promise to, to finish your book. When you know who you are as a writer and creative and who you want to be, you begin to stand on a firmer foundation. You begin to live with more focus. Each action you take can bring you into life living as that person, or becoming someone else completely different.

Try this: I want to be a writer who (fill in the blank).

2. How does what you are actually writing resonate with who you are?

You might find that a reason you are struggling to make time every day for your creative writing habits is because it just doesn’t feel like you’re the one to write it. Are you writing something in the way you think it “should be written” or are you writing in a way that feels authentic to you personally and in your own voice? Do you actually need to write this? Or, is this writing something someone else could do instead of you?

Try this: Read a selection of your book out loud. How well does it read aloud? Take notes and make adjustments accordingly in revision time.

3. Who is your reader?

Think of a single person you are telling your story to. In your imagination, bring them into your room. Perhaps, if your ideal reader is a couple different people, set out metaphorical chairs in your writing room for these few people and then write like you’re speaking or reading to just them.

You may argue your book is for more than these couple of folks, or even that it’s for everyone. That’s great! You’ve got massive vision. But, it’s important you speak directly to these individuals so your readers know the story is for them. If you speak to the crowd, it all tends to get muddy and harder for your readers to connect with you and the stories you’re trying to share.

Try this: Imagine your ideal reader sat in the chair across from you. Pay attention to what they are doing or saying and allow them to react and respond while you read and write.

4. How does what you are actually writing help your reader?

Think of your actual ideal reader. How is what you’re writing for them bringing inspiration or helping them learn or entertaining them? It can be tempting to write for the agent or publisher or your 2nd grade teacher who told you you’d never write anything good.

But unless they are a picture of your ideal reader, don’t bring them into your living room to tell them your story. Writing can be a fight to get the words out. When you consider who your words will actually help, this can bring clarity and the second wind of endurance you need to finish strong.

Try this: As you already have your ideal reader sat in the chair across from you, read your words out loud to them. Think critically whether what you’ve written resonates with them. You may want to imagine their facial expressions. Even better could be to get your literal ideal reader together with you and ask them for focused feedback.

5. Why are you writing this book?

If you’re like most creative people, you’ve probably got heaps of inspiration and ideas mulling around in that imagination of yours. Knowing why you’ve chosen to write this particular one can be a gift of clarity to help you finish it.

There was one point when it seemed like the best idea in the world to work on this book right now. Take a moment to remember why this is important to you.

Also, think about some of the other books you would like to write. They won’t get written if you don’t finish this one. Use the promise of the next book you want to write to propel you onward. Perhaps you have a series in mind or a collection – those books need each other.

Try this: Make a list of reasons why you chose to write this book. Put the list somewhere you can see it regularly. Read it out loud to yourself as often as it takes.

6. What are you most excited about for this book?

If you’ve been working on this book for a while, it might have lost its sparkle from conception. Maybe you’re in the messy middle and it feels very messy and all you can think of is how much it’s going to take to clean it all up and make sense of all the mind mud.

Maybe you’ve been saying things like this for months (to yourself and others), “I’m very nearly finished…I just have the last little details to polish…just one last bit to sort out…” This can be demoralizing and prolong the finishing.

Try this: Make a list of 3-5 aspects of your book that excite you. You may refer to some pieces on your previous list. And, you may use future books as an incentive to get excited enough to propel you to the finish. Put your list somewhere you can read it and remember as often as it takes.

7. What would happen to your readers if you never finished this book?

The reality is that perhaps nothing would happen if you never finished writing this book. But, consider your readers again. If you feel compelled to write something, to persevere through actually finishing a bunch of words in book form and getting it out into the world, then it’s likely worth finishing.

It’s worth finishing because of who the words are for. Your readers may continue feeling sad and not knowing how to escape and if they don’t read your novel, they won’t learn about the magical land of Smorithinya and its mystical beings, the Carinchimpfs who can only fly with their eyes closed. If you don’t finish your book, your readers will never experience the connection they would have when they read your memoir – their feelings of being outcast and uninspired will remain. They will still be stuck in their issues and unsure how to go forward – even though your book, were you to finish it, would provide some answers.

Try this: Imagine: What would happen to your readers if you never finished this book?

8. What will it feel like to see people devouring your book?

You’ll never know the feeling of how your words impact the world in a positive way if you don’t finish writing your book and putting it out into the world. But to imagine how big of a rippling and far reaching impact that it could make? All of the potential it could have? If only you finished getting your words on the page and submitted.

But, how cool to watch the delight in young readers’ eyes. How cool to witness the transformation in a person when you walk them through the step-by-step process of how you overcame obstacles. How amazing it will feel to hear about how much your book meant to your readers.

Try this: Imagine: What will it feel like to see people devouring your book?

9. When are you writing?

The human mind and emotions and body and soul are complicated. These all play a role in our stick-to-it-ness of finishing the book, but also toward how you feel during your writing times.

Even though last season worked really well to write in the early morning, now the sun rises earlier and you find it too distracting to watch the sunrise. Perhaps you’ve changed your diet or exercise routine and now you need to make sure you eat before you write instead of after like you did last year. There are so many factors which it might be helpful to consider.

Try this: Take an honest assessment of the time of day, the length of time, the frequency each week. Assess what you’re doing before and after your writing time, too. Determine whether this is the best time and schedule for you to continue using. Make a change, if necessary.

10. What needs to happen for you to keep the momentum?

Sometimes life gets in the way and we need to restructure life and our writing schedule for them to work and play well together. Sometimes saying “no” to late nights with friends or family extras needs to happen for a season. Sometimes riding the wave of inspiration needs to happen even though it’s late into the night.

What habits are preventing you from moving forward to cross the finish line? What habits would help to slingshot you across the finish? What is something awesome (or not-so-awesome) that has actually been keeping you from finishing? Even good things can hold us back.

Try this: Consider what you could pause for a season that could help you finish your book. Then, have the conversation to get extra help. Buy noise canceling headphones. Put your writing pants on – whatever it takes, and keep the momentum.

That’s it. Those are the questions to ask so you can habitually finish your book–or, books!

Consider each of these questions as much as you need to, but please, don’t use trying to find the best answers for each question as another thing to prevent you from finishing your book. There are so many reasons which could prevent us from finishing. From health issues, to busy seasons at work, to creative blockages from fear, imposter syndrome, perfectionism. Whatever your “thing” is that’s preventing you from finishing, get some help.

Do the inner work yourself to be able to address it with these questions and then you’ve got a starting point to get the help you need. Depending on the topic, you could be experiencing resistance due to the highly emotional content or you could be experiencing resistance if you feel like you’re not the most qualified person to talk about this issue or teach this subject.

Perhaps interviewing an expert for your topic’s research could help. Maybe a session with a counselor could help un-pick what’s holding you back. An accountability writing group who meet regularly could be just the ticket. Enrolling in writing classes and hiring a creative writing coach could be just what you need.

Do what it takes. Tell a friend. Ask for help. Remind yourself of the writer you are and who you want to be. Remind yourself of who will miss out if you don’t finish. Get your words out from your brain to the page and into the hands of readers who will devour your book! Put the stake in the ground and write. You can totally do this. I believe in you!

Happy writing!

Hey, I’m Molly Ovenden. Author, Creative Writing Coach, Visual Artist, Perseverance Expert. Let’s talk to see if working with a Creative Writing Coach is your next best step. Schedule your free call now.

Just Chattin’ with K. A. Williams, Author of The Firebird Chronicles

Watch Kristen Williams be interviewed by Molly Ovenden.

Visit Kristen Williams’ blog and buy her books! https://k-a-williams.com/

Firebird and Olympus (Book 2 of The Firebird Chronicles) are available for purchase.

In this video, Kristen shares her writing process and the creation of The Firebird Chronicles as well as tips and advice for writers who long to get their words out there.

Join Kristen in her science fiction world with a full cast of strong women who lead the way on Mars in the year 3000. It’s a feisty, wild west, anarchy kind of place. Kristen loves following her characters down the darkened corridors of imaginative prewriting and really getting to know them.

Write
Setting up a pattern of writing regularly trains your brain to be ready when the time to write comes along. Often people who want to be writers believe wrongly that writing comes as a muse and must only happen with the presence of the muse. Kristen says that it’s actually a habit of regularly writing that means when you come home from working your day job, you’ll naturally be thinking about writing your stories and mentally ready to work on them. Without the regularity of a writing practice, you may be inclined to plop down with pizza and a beer and make no headway on your special writing projects.
Read Writing Blogs
Kristen says that learning about other writers means that inspiration can come from others’ perspectives on the writing life and process. She has loved Patrick Rothfuss’ blog, author of The Name of the Wind. Particularly beneficial, Kristen said, are his earliest blog articles. Reading how another writer (even the prolific, audacious, and resilient published authors) processes balancing writing with other aspects of life, writing to deadlines, carrying on conversations that feel real with their characters, dealing with imposter syndrome even after you’ve published, etc. can be exceedingly beneficial in the realization that the moments of madness that occur as a writer are normal, generally acceptable, and reassuring that you aren’t alone after all.
Read
Reading fills our creative cups. Reading voraciously and widely perpetuations imagination and creative thought. It ensures that you think about your own writing whilst studying others’. Reading with pleasure helps remind you of part of the purpose you have as a writer: to connect with others through the words you put into the world.

Molly Ovenden is a creative writing coach, professional writer, teacher, and visual artist. Visit https://mollyovenden.com/ where creativity is a habit to find out more.

Are you a published author who would like to be interviewed by Molly Ovenden?
Complete this form in order to be considered.

Are you a writer who feels stuck in their writing process or who would like help to make creative writing a habit in their lives? Book a Discovery Call with Molly Ovenden as your creative writing coach to determine whether hiring her would be your next right step to take in your writing life.
Book your Discovery Call here.

Is Your Inner Critic Affecting Your Creativity in Your Writing?

I am going to take a not-so-wild guess and say that your answer is “Yes!” The Inner Critic can be a loud jerk shouting mean words at us or it could be low frequency whisper that raise doubt and suspicion about our ability to write or, in extreme cases, our right to take up space. The Inner Critic is a shame-mongering champion cage fighter. I know this firsthand and deal with it as I write this blog post. I’ve read other writers’ accounts of their Inner Critic battles. I also have heard from writing students over the years how they struggle with it.

One student asked me for help, “I get criticism from family for prioritizing writing over household chores. It has gotten to the point that I often hear my Inner Editor saying that I should be doing chores instead of writing.”

I was so glad that this student reached out for help to get their writing going. These are really important issues that they have raised. Our Inner Critic can often become an imagined monster of a real human who has been in our lives who said something to us that hurt.

I can list several negative voices that have fueled my Inner Critic:
1. My kindergarten teacher told me I chose wrong during free choice time and that it was not my turn to paint, after all.
2. My dad told me to pursue any career that would make lots of money and he told me out of the blue one day that I would be a starving artist.
3. A mentor told me that I must be doing it all wrong because there’s no way that I’m selling as many paintings as I said that I am.

This all begs me to answer the questions, “Who is in your life?” and “What are you listening to?” Check out the post I wrote about asking yourself five questions to unlock creativity in your life. Read it here.

Some suggestions that I can give to encourage your writing habits:

1. Keep writing affirmations about your identity as a writer. You are at a fragile stage now when you need to continually remind yourself that writing is a great use of time and that it is a gift. Writing can also be a form of therapy for some people and crucial to one’s well-being. It can be as important for some as eating, going for a walk to exercise with fresh air, or meeting with a friend to chat so you remember that you’re loved and that you belong. Writing can be crucial in maintaining a healthy form of escapism as you create a world to live in for a break in your imagination. It can also be a way that you can journal and find out your beliefs–or that you discover how you feel about something based on how one of your characters reacts!

2. Do it afraid. Your Inner Critic and Editor is there all the time. I think it takes more than just ignoring it. I think it’s actually important to acknowledge that it’s there, but let it know that you’re choosing to write anyway and choosing to believe that you’re a writer. Perhaps redefining certain times and types of writing, too, could help. Maybe you designate morning times of writing for your playful freewriter to come out and have fun, and then in the afternoon or evening it’s the editor’s turn to comb through what you wrote that morning or last week.

3. Do your writing in secret, if you have to, for a season. Often when we make changes to our own lives it upsets the homeostasis of our environment and others around us can feel threatened by our change because change is hard for people. They may fear losing you, they may fear losing control over you as you gain freedom and identity and self-confidence in your writing, they may fear that they will be forced to change when they don’t want to. Your safety is important. Please make sure that you are safe in your home or that you seek help if you need it.
But, if it means that you loudly and visibly do your chores and then later you quietly retreat with your door closed (to a local coffee shop or bookstore) and ‘clean your room’ or ‘do some errands’ or ‘have quiet, alone time,’ then do that. Get up early, ‘go to bed’ early, write during meals (or instead of eating and then eat while you do something else).

4. Join a writing group. When we are in isolation the negative voices can be louder than ever because we don’t have other options to listen to or to drown it out. On healthy and strong days this might not be a problem, but on weak and tired and lonely days (I’ve had lots of those over the years), negativity can be a spitting tyrant refusing to be silenced. This is when the kind words, the community, compassion, connection with a writing group can be really beneficial. Take courage and join a group. There are many writing groups on Facebook or elsewhere online and there are likely groups in your local area, either in-person or meeting virtually. Some might have a membership fee and others might be free. Check your local library, community education catalog, or community center. Whatever the case, being in the company of other writers who “get it” truly is priceless.

Photo by Startup Stock Photos from Pexels

In the end, our Inner Critic will always be present. Whether or not we give weight to its words is a different story. Sometimes acknowledging the fear that is present in the Inner Critic’s words can be the key to growth and getting words on a page. Other times, you might be able to have a conversation with your family member or friend who has instigated the negative voices and given your Inner Critic the demoralizing script to read from–it won’t necessarily be easy, but it could be helpful to explain what writing means to you and why you want to prioritize it. Even other times it might simply be your best bet to take action and do what needs to get done and not worry about what other people think. I know this is not always the easiest and in fact, it can be quite challenging, but I think that it is worth it to get creative freedom!

What are some tricks you use to combat the incessant ramblings of the Inner Critic?
Leave me a comment, please! 🙂

Braving the Wilderness as a 5-year-old

Project Perseverance: Journal Entry #2

Written on: Monday 5 February 2018

Braving the Wilderness by Brene Brown p.13

“…I just started sobbing. I didn’t break down because I hadn’t made the drill team, I wept for the girl that I couldn’t comfort back then. The girl who didn’t understand what was happening or why…”

As I read this, I can totally relate. I am processing many moments of pain, regret, disappointment, wounding, misunderstandings, mismatched expectations–many of which have been suppressed for years. I have often been experiencing just what Brene Brown describes here looking back at the devastation to her teenage heart and all the pain and meaning made from not being accepted to the drill team and how all this meaning involved not belonging and the despair of never belonging or fitting in anywhere.

I know this feeling well.

I cry now for sweet, five-year-old Molly who was beginning to paint a picture during free choice time in kindergarten and the teacher ripped down her painting (just one blue horizontal stroke, so far) and put it on the floor by the window. “It’s not your turn to paint, Molly.” Another child had asked permission to paint at the easel.

Because I had not asked (because it was free choice time and we were told we could choose to do anything we wanted), I was humiliated. I never painted again except in art class when we were required to.

I remember really wanting to be in art club in high school, but “knew” that I wasn’t good enough and probably wouldn’t be allowed to anyway. And so now, 25 years later, I have learned to say to sweet, five-year-old Molly: “It’s always my turn to paint.”

Brown says, “These are the moments that, when left unspoken and unresolved, send us into our adult lives searching desperately for belonging and settling for fitting in.”

These five questions have helped me and some of my friends to reflect and notice when something is holding us back or keeping us stuck. They could help you, too. Sign up here.

Leave me a comment.

What are some of the voices that have echoed in your ears for many years?
What do you do when you are “searching desperate for belonging”?
What would you like to try today that you lost out on when you were younger?

https://mollyovenden.com/what-is-project-perseverance/

How Affirmations Can Inspire Your Creativity

My Story.

“It’s not your turn.”

In kindergarten, it was free choice time–we could choose to do anything we wanted, so I went over to the easel and made one big vertical blue streak. Then, my teacher came over with another child, who had an apron on, and told me that it wasn’t my turn to paint. That I hadn’t asked permission to paint, but this other child had asked permission. I was confused–it was free choice time and we could choose to do anything we wanted to do, but…somehow I chose wrong? The teacher ripped my page, with its one blue streak, off the easel and set it on the floor by the window. I had to find something else to do.

For so many years, part of me has remained this five year old who was told that I’d made the wrong choice when I chose to paint. I have had to learn to rewrite this memory so it has less of a negative impact as it likes to play on repeat and persuade me to give in to fear.

It is always my turn to paint.

Application for Us

Once I found out that I had been subconsciously holding onto this lie that it wasn’t my turn and that I had chosen wrongly, I was able to make a change. I had no idea why I was resistant to spending time making art or why it felt like forbidden fruit to be created in secret when I had the opportunity to rebel. Now that I know, I can remind and affirm myself that:

1. It is always my turn to paint.
2. When I paint, I’ve made a great decision.
3. It is a good use of my time to paint.
4. My art is worthy of hanging on walls to be appreciated.
5. I am a grown up and I have given myself indefinite permission to paint.

By working with affirmations, I am able to grow and be more creative.

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I often find it helpful to journal in writing questions and answers as a way to process what I’m thinking or feeling about a situation. Especially, when it’s something like this, from my forgotten past. If writing seems like it’d be helpful for you, I want to invite you to take time over the next week or so to reflect on these questions and how you might answer them.

When is a time that you felt like you were doing the wrong thing (when morals were actually not in question)? What was the situation? How old were you? Who was with you?
What meaning did you assign to that experience? What have you told yourself since then?
Ask God what might have been the result of feeling like you were wrong? What have you been prevented from doing?
Imagine the best version of yourself: How would you love to spend your days? What type of person would you love to be?
What might life look like if you started to give yourself permission for these things?
Who might you be able to talk to about taking these new steps?
What is the negative belief, meaning, lie that you’ve been telling yourself? How could you change it around to be a positive affirmation?

What have you learned from working with affirmations?

What questions do you have around this process of turning a negative thought into a positive one?

Leave a comment below.